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Pre Marital & Post Marital Relationship

Hi,I am 18 years old girl.i love a married man and he loves me too.My problem is that when it was just starting of our affair,we used to chat for around 2 to 3 hours daily..while chatting,we always did romance..but when i made complete physical relation with him(without sex),he started avoiding me..he would always say that he has very busy routine and does not have time to chat..from the last 10 months,he is behaving like this..he says he loves me truly and when i fight with him for this,he says that i am immature and should understand his situation.he never calls me and never let me call him bcz he wants to be cautious..we hardly talk for about thrice a month on phone,and when we talk,he does not talks for more than 10 minutes..he never replies to my sms now.he says we shuold contact each other via internet only..he replies to my mails,but he never initiates..moreover,he always appear invisible to me in messenger..he says he want freedom..sometimes i have to wait for about an hour to chat with him and even then he chats for not more than 20 min,,and that also twice or thrice a week..the same reason,he says he has very busy routine.we hardly meet.. we used to have physical relation too..when he calls me(once or twice in a month)he wants me to come to his place to have physical relation.we used to have physical relation about twice a month..and now he wants to go for sex also..we had it once,but i cant go for sex in future as i think i am deceiving my family.my family trusts and love me a lot.when i told him that i wont go for physical relation in future,he said that he dont wants to go for love any more and he will be my good friend only!!he is living alone here.his family is in other city and he goes every weekend to meet them.he has a child also..i know our love has no future,,but i love him unconditionally,very truly and deeply.please help me.it is disturbing my studies also.i am a non-medical student an this is the time for my carrier building.i have dropped a year for IIT,but i think about him most of the time and gets upset from his behaviour.i cant concentrate on my studies..i cant understand what is going on!i tried to leave him,but i could not.i love him a lot.non of my friend or family memeber knows about it.i cant discuss my problem with any one of them.please tell me what to do.pls do reply fast. confused


As you have accepted in you message that you know this is not right even I would say the same. Just analyze that this relation is not only between both of you, this has to do with many people who are related to both of you. See just think, if you got married & your husband does something like this how would you feel - I am pretty sure you wouldn't like it. Think about his wife & family. From the sounds of it I don't feel he is into any commitment and he is interested only in physical stuff, thats what I gauge.

I would advice to stop this as soon as possible. Concentrate on your studies, it simple you can do it. Just convince yourself that what you are doing is wrong and everything else would follow.

Hope you would be convinced & agree with what I said.


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